Ending April...

So today a new cycle starts...yeah! (Now read it with some sarcasm) Every month I tell myself I'm going to do whatever it takes to get pregnant and every month I continue to let myself down. So this month I WILL try harder! I want this pregnancy so bad and I'm tired of waiting.

Our approach to this infertility thing has been pretty conservative since our insurance doesn't cover fertility issues. However, if we seriously try for a few more months and nothing happens I may give in and see another fertility doctor. We did visit a fertility clinic about 9 months ago but some of the things they were doing seemed somewhat pointless. We did a couple of ultrasounds to make sure I was ovulating. The ultrasounds ended up being done a few days too early and resulted in me using ovulation prediction kits at home. So I could drive 1 1/2 hours for an ultrasound that costs about $120 each visit or pee on a stick at home costing about $3...hmm!?! They also didn't give us much guidance when we didn't conceive. I was kind of thinking they would present some sort of game plan and was disappointed that they didn't. So, we'll try on our own a little longer and hope that works!

Bad timing...

As I wrote in our family blog, I attempted to go for a run this morning but my efforts failed. I usually try to avoid running during the two week wait just in case I could be pregnant. So since I'm blogging about some desire to go for a run, let's just take that as a sign that I'm probably not pregnant again this month. I really could have tried harder and Will will be the first to agree to that! I'm just so tired after working and not getting home until 11:30 at night. I really need to quit this job so I can feel normal again. I did request an additional day off every week starting in May. Let's hope that leaves a little more time for baby making!

I will hope that maybe I've ovulated a little later and keep up hope that this could be the month! So next week I may start the horrible progesterone supplements again! UGH!!!

Hahaha!

Well as some sort of cruel joke my period was late by 5 days and just happened to start right on April 1st! What the hell!?!
I desperately hope that we stay free of illness the next few months so we can make some sort of normal attempt at conceiving. I don't intend for it to appear that we are in some sort of rush to conceive, but in a way we are! We aren't getting any younger and while it's true that Will can produce children up until the day he dies, the same isn't true for me. I'm starting to worry that if this takes much longer I may not be able to create a child. I know, I know...I'm not even thirty yet but it's really not that far away either. It took us five years to conceive Jace and another two years between Jace and our losses. Of course we weren't actively trying during the entire time but most people not using contraceptives seem to not have such a long wait. Maybe if Will gets fired and we end up on welfare I'll get pregnant! Hahaha!