So far so good!

My HCG (pregnancy hormone) level was 399 on Monday and 1279 today(Thursday). That is exactly what we needed to see! I'm going to do another one on Monday just to check that it is still increasing. I'm getting a little more excited though! Also, I have to say I love my midwife's office/staff. They are treating me so well and moving my appointments up earlier than normal just so I can make sure everything is okay. So, I will have an ultrasound on March 18th or sooner if they have an opening. I hope this is the one!

OOPS!

I may have been a little to quick to write my last post saying this month was another failure. We ARE pregnant!!! I'm very, very nervous but really hoping everything turns out well. It has been almost 2 years since our last pregnancy and I would really like this one to stick so we don't have to wait another 2 years. I really wasn't expecting to get pregnant this month and didn't even rush to take a test yesterday(Sunday) when I should have started a new cycle. I also left the store today without purchasing any pregancy tests, but realized when I got out to the car that I forgot deodarant for Will and then decided to make the test purchase since the deodarant and the test were in close proximaty to one another and I happened to have a coupon for the tests so I figured what the heck, I'll just buy them.

As soon as I read "pregnant" on the display I showed Will and then called my midwife to request labwork. Jace and I hustled over to the lab to have my progesterone level and HCG level tested. I won't know a whole lot until Thursday when I can do another HCG check and compare to the first number and hope for a substantial increase to show a viable pregnancy.

Of course I'm over analyzing every change I feel and making bad associations with our past miscarriages. I really hope Thursday will tell us some great news so I can relax a tiny bit. I'm not out of the woods until the first trimester is over which won't be until mid April. Nothing is official, but we are definitely hoping this is our chance to welcome another child into our hearts.

Probably not this month.

We really did try and I think we timed everything pretty well, but (there is always a but) I was WAY TOO stressed and as a result I'm sure my body wasn't functioning properly. I should know for sure by Sunday or Monday, but I have a feeling our attempts didn't work once again.
I did have an appointment with my midwife this week and I was hoping to view my labwork from the Gyft Clinic, but (see there it is again) the Gyft Clinic never faxed the requested records so I know nothing about my labwork. I tried though!

I'm back...

Obviously, I don't have any good news to share. Our efforts have been minimal considering how busy we've been through the holidays and starting school. We're still hopeful though! Okay, maybe Will is, I'm not so much. I have about 1 week until I start my next cycle. Yes, I'm sure it's coming because I have absolutely no pregnancy symptoms. I am, however, bummed that I'll have my cycle twice this month for some reason. Fun times!

My body...

First, I did take a test only to have a negative result reminding of what a long journey this has been. It also occurred to me today that I absolutely have this love-hate relationship with my body that I thought I'd share.

I hate that my body...
-could not hold onto the babies I wished for so badly.
-can't seem to function properly to carry a child again.
-seems to have a mind of it's own.

I love that my body...
-can produce such an amazing miracle.
-allowed me to see what being a mom is all about.

(Now sobbing)
I will forever be thankful for being able to experience pregnancy and having such an amazing child. I only wish I could have one last chance to completely cherish being pregnant and allow Jace the experience of being a big brother. It's has been 1 1/2 years since our last pregnancy and I'm losing hope that we will ever get pregnant again. I'm so frustrated right now!

Wait and see...

Who knows if our attempts worked this month, let's hope they did though. I don't really feel any different compared to other months but it's a bit early to start noticing any changes. I did ovulate a little later than I was hoping for and that could be the reason we don't conceive this month. So, just a few more weeks to go and we'll see what the verdict is.

Time to get serious!

Woohoo! I just placed an order for Pre-Seed and 12 ovulation prediction kits. As soon as I receive my order we're getting serious about baby making! I'm getting too old and Jace wants a sibling so we can't keep hoping we get it right. Plus, this month was a horrible month for trying to conceive so we really need to give it all we've got for the rest of the year.

FYI:Pre-Seed acts like your own cervical mucus and helps the little swimmers get where they need to be.